Sunday, March 29, 2009

@ 11:51 AM

Hellos shuhui here (: look i am the first among the 3 of us to post yay haha
Actually i wanted to post yesterday but i went out for dinner so i didn't get to post lol. By the way, have you all been to the new sembawang shopping centre? I went there yesteday for dinner. We ate at the coffee shops oppsite the shopping centre; the white beehoon was very nice haha and the fried sotong was yummy (: After that we went to shop in the shopping centre then i asked my sister what crime would she commit if she wouldn't be caught for it lol then she said she will kill me ): so evil T.T then i ask my mother the same question and she gave the same answer as my sister )): they are the evil duo ))): so if all the cops on earth die, i will have to go into hiding lol poor me haha after that we went to the pet lovers centre and saw the hamster there they very active and super cute lol i am going to save money and buy one (: but my mum says if only buy one then nobody play with it then it will be very lonely so ke3 lian2 so maybe i should buy two hamsters (:
Hey I found some jokes lol lemme share 'em with yall ((:
1. A frog calls a psychic Recently, the Psychic Hotline and Psychic Friends Network have launched hotlines for frogs. Here is the story of one frog and his discussing with his psychic.A frog telephones the Psychic Hotline and is told, "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you."The frog says, "This is great! Will I meet her at a party, or what?""No," says the psychic. "Next semester in her biology class."
Anyone knows why i use green fonts? cos green is the colour of frogs haha green font for frog jokes (:
2. Promoting an office
A psychotherapist was having a roaring business since he started from scratch. So much so that he could now afford to have a proper shop banner advertising his wares. So he told a kid to paint the sign board for him & put it above his shop entrance. But, instead of his business building up, it began to slacken. He had especially noticed the ladies shying away from his shop after reading the sign board. So he decided to check it out himself. Then he understood why ! The boy found a small wooden board so he had split the word into the 3 words : Psycho-the-rapist.
3. Finish the start
My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished two bags of chips and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.
4. Psychiatrist phone
Hello. Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline
If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2.
If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5, and 6.
If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the line so we can trace the call.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press. No one will answer.
If you are anxious, just start pressing numbers at random.
If you are phobic, don't press anything.
If you are anal retentive, please hold.
Hahaha no. 4 is funny haha
5. What is the time?
A man is strolling past the mental hospital and suddenly remembers an important meeting.Unfortunately, his watch has stopped, and he cannot tell if he is late or not. Then, he notices a patient similarly strolling about within the hospital fence.Calling out to the patient, the man says, "Pardon me, sir, but do you have the time?"The patient calls back, "One moment!" and throws himself upon the ground, pulling out a short stick as he does. He pushes the stick into the ground, and, pulling out a carpenter's level, assures himself that the stick is vertical.With a compass, the patient locates north and with a steel ruler, measures the precise length of the shadow cast by the stick.Withdrawing a slide rule from his pocket, the patient calculates rapidly, then swiftly packs up all his tools and turns back to the pedestrian, saying, "It is now precisely 3:29 pm, provided today is August 16th, which I believe it is."The man can't help but be impressed by this demonstration, and sets his watch accordingly.Before he leaves, he says to the patient, "That was really quite remarkable, but tell me, what do you do on a cloudy day, or at night, when the stick casts no shadow?" The patient holds up his wrist and says, "I suppose I'd just look at my watch."
Haha this one very lame lol
Okay got to go adios (:

Sunday, March 29, 2009

@ 11:51 AM

Hellos shuhui here (: look i am the first among the 3 of us to post yay haha
Actually i wanted to post yesterday but i went out for dinner so i didn't get to post lol. By the way, have you all been to the new sembawang shopping centre? I went there yesteday for dinner. We ate at the coffee shops oppsite the shopping centre; the white beehoon was very nice haha and the fried sotong was yummy (: After that we went to shop in the shopping centre then i asked my sister what crime would she commit if she wouldn't be caught for it lol then she said she will kill me ): so evil T.T then i ask my mother the same question and she gave the same answer as my sister )): they are the evil duo ))): so if all the cops on earth die, i will have to go into hiding lol poor me haha after that we went to the pet lovers centre and saw the hamster there they very active and super cute lol i am going to save money and buy one (: but my mum says if only buy one then nobody play with it then it will be very lonely so ke3 lian2 so maybe i should buy two hamsters (:
Hey I found some jokes lol lemme share 'em with yall ((:
1. A frog calls a psychic Recently, the Psychic Hotline and Psychic Friends Network have launched hotlines for frogs. Here is the story of one frog and his discussing with his psychic.A frog telephones the Psychic Hotline and is told, "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you."The frog says, "This is great! Will I meet her at a party, or what?""No," says the psychic. "Next semester in her biology class."
Anyone knows why i use green fonts? cos green is the colour of frogs haha green font for frog jokes (:
2. Promoting an office
A psychotherapist was having a roaring business since he started from scratch. So much so that he could now afford to have a proper shop banner advertising his wares. So he told a kid to paint the sign board for him & put it above his shop entrance. But, instead of his business building up, it began to slacken. He had especially noticed the ladies shying away from his shop after reading the sign board. So he decided to check it out himself. Then he understood why ! The boy found a small wooden board so he had split the word into the 3 words : Psycho-the-rapist.
3. Finish the start
My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished two bags of chips and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.
4. Psychiatrist phone
Hello. Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline
If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2.
If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5, and 6.
If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the line so we can trace the call.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press. No one will answer.
If you are anxious, just start pressing numbers at random.
If you are phobic, don't press anything.
If you are anal retentive, please hold.
Hahaha no. 4 is funny haha
5. What is the time?
A man is strolling past the mental hospital and suddenly remembers an important meeting.Unfortunately, his watch has stopped, and he cannot tell if he is late or not. Then, he notices a patient similarly strolling about within the hospital fence.Calling out to the patient, the man says, "Pardon me, sir, but do you have the time?"The patient calls back, "One moment!" and throws himself upon the ground, pulling out a short stick as he does. He pushes the stick into the ground, and, pulling out a carpenter's level, assures himself that the stick is vertical.With a compass, the patient locates north and with a steel ruler, measures the precise length of the shadow cast by the stick.Withdrawing a slide rule from his pocket, the patient calculates rapidly, then swiftly packs up all his tools and turns back to the pedestrian, saying, "It is now precisely 3:29 pm, provided today is August 16th, which I believe it is."The man can't help but be impressed by this demonstration, and sets his watch accordingly.Before he leaves, he says to the patient, "That was really quite remarkable, but tell me, what do you do on a cloudy day, or at night, when the stick casts no shadow?" The patient holds up his wrist and says, "I suppose I'd just look at my watch."
Haha this one very lame lol
Okay got to go adios (: